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Cosplay for a Cause [19 Jan 2006|12:02am]

Click pic for link to official website for more information. ^^
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The Story of a Girl. [06 May 2005|10:48pm]
[ mood | tired ]

I have been toying with the thought of changing things lately.

There comes a point in life when you end up unsatisfied with what the hell goes on around you. And this is one point I am experiencing now.

I wish it was as simple as deleting and erasing fragments of unhappiness so that we can experience the plain joy of living.

Reading more and more reports of people's blogs being exploited and berated makes me sad.

Blog are meant to be a medium of expression. Like public speaking on a personal scale. Even if I don't have the courage or ability to voice my thoughts and emotions in Real Life, blogging is suppose to be some way of escapism. However, some people just don't get it.

Nothing I say here is meant to offend. At least, not intentionally. There is still some decency left in me to strive towards political correctness.

Yet literature, or words, has this loophole of being multi faceted, hence having many ways of interpretation by different people.

Even if I were to write something that appears offensive or outrageous to you, there is still the freedom of choice. You don't have to accept it, but please respect my choice. If there is some streak of maturity, you should understand that everyone is entitled to their own opinions. If we were all forced to think the same way, abide by the same method of living, won't we be anything but lifeless and mindless drones.

The rules are merely guidelines. (Recognise the quote?)

As long as we don't stray too far from it, things should be fine.

No one has to right to take my words, my blog and my life as a basis for debate. Though public, this journal is personal. Paradoxical but that's the way it is. Of course, while trying to be as honest and truthful all at once, there is also some practise of self-censorship. I don't really pour all my raw emotions and thoughts onto this journal. But still, it's as real as I can be. Hence, I would appreciate it if my words are not used against me. Atleast have some compassion and let me be. Don't take this avenue of emotional release from me.

Especially if you are not a blogger yourself.

You don't know how much this space means to me. It has helped me push myself away from the brink of depression. It has been my only comfort when there is no one by my side. It belongs to me. Copyrighted to me. It has made me friends. Or realise who my friends really are.

But this space has been tied too tightly to my real life. And insecurity has slowly motivated me to come to a conclusion.

I need a fresh start.

So... I am closing this journal.

I will still keep up with my friends list, etc. But no more about me. I need a sort of closure. I need to move on.

I might start over, create a new stage to call my own, but for now, I am keeping things to myself.

The End


6 comments|post comment

Cosfest 2005 [05 May 2005|10:22pm]
I know I was planning to set up shop at the end of year cosplay con, but I didn't think I was still able to apply for a booth for the June Cosfest. But the mod just replied and I might actually stand a chance getting my own space there~!

WOo HOo~!

Man... this means I do have to fix my comp. Because I won't be able to save anything on this compy with the burner toasted (no pun intended). Without any saves, I can't get my artwork to the shops to be printed. >_<

Anyway, I am probably off on vacation to Japan hence a major spending spree to get stuff to sell at the cosfest along with my old manga and artwork. On the side, I will also be promoting S.A.G.A which has been promoted to Zettai SAGA, because I think it's cooler. XD

Oh... and if anyone has any idea on where I can go in Japan, feel free to bombard me with advice. Even though I have been to the country twice, it was waaaay before my fangirl days. XD

Maybe I will get my Inuyasha plushie this time.

Well, since I am going to pimping my art work, I am working on some new drawing to make my artwork selection more... impressive?

Here's the link:

OMG. Trinity Blood is so.... *drools*... the anime I mean. I love the art... so pretty~!

BUT... I think the seiyuus are a bit weird... Abel doesn't sound sexy enough or cute enough... Hmmm...


6 comments|post comment

B.U.T.FOOL [05 May 2005|05:13pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

I usually get what I want. Seriously.

As long as I really want it, I will get it.

My past history has proven that I am one damn lucky person. Let's just take examinations for example.

I might not have studied much, understood much or memorised much but still be able to scrape through them without much effort. All I hoped for was grades that could get me into whatever I wanted. I didn't need straight As because that would just have gotten the parental on my case. Doing just moderately was more of my style because I clearly knew what I wanted... most of the time that is. Teachers saw potiential in me, but I simply wasn't going to live up to expectation because living by other people's standards is pretty constricting and well, stupid. Hence, I was very much happy doing what I liked.

Let's start from the PSLE, an examination that Singaporean 12 year olds dread.

Heaven know how little effort I put into the books. While others were being sent off to tuition classes and tormented by tuition teachers, I was just slacking around, playing hopscotch and scraping by with medicore grades. Though we didn't have a ranking system in primary school, it was pretty clear that I was first from the bottom as I compared my grades with those around me. That got my mom in a panic and for the last three months before the exams, I was sent off to bootcamp at a private tutor's house. Even then, I managed not to do most of my assignments and harbour thoughts of skip class.

Then, my mom threw me the ultimatum. She would give me anything I wanted if I got decent results, or hell if otherwise. Frankly, her words didn't create much of an impact because it was too close the exams for me to really buckle up and get down to business. Still, it gave me ample time to hope and pray for good news.

On the day of the results, I wasn't expecting much. Usually after sitting through a paper, you would know roughly how well you did. I knew I would have done okay, but maybe not enough to meet my mother's standards. Hence, you could imagine my surprise when I received my results to see that I was technically the best in my class. (My class wasn't a brillant bunch of students, but still, the results were pretty sparkling compared to most of the generally population.)

Thus, my luck prevailed and up to this day, I still think that my grades were some fluke or mistake the ministry of education failed to spot.

Those results brought me to TKGS.

Secondary school didn't mean much, I still didn't study enough but rather placed my energies in other areas. This should be slightly more interesting.

Drama Club was the one CCA that I wanted to get into. Obviously, I was again lucky to get in. You see, it was a pretty popular CCA and not everyone who wanted to be in got in. This time, it took my previous history in primary school to secure a spot in this particular club. Back in primary school, my luck also prevailed. I got what I wanted again when I got the lead roles in school performances, musicals and whatnot. Some people might call it talent, but I call it pure luck. I remember how I wanted the challenge of being a granny in a skit competition. No, I didn't want to be the lead character but the character's grandmother because I knew that the granny was important. See? Even when young, I was already good at scheming. XD Plus, it was funky dressing up as someone much older than I was, and it gave me the excuse to scold anyone who dared make fun of me. Anyway, back on track, when in Drama club, I always got the roles I wanted. The first time there was a major role up for grabs for the juniors, I clinched it. Sadly, I ended up with a broken leg but still, it rocked to know that I was the one picked. (Plus, breaking my leg resulted in me missing out on torturous NAPFA test/ physical fitness test for a whole for four years, a worthwhile exchange I would like the say.)

Later on, I secretly hoped to get the chance to play characters I wanted and my wishes always came through. Maybe my Drama teacher had a thing for putting me in roles I happened to fancy or that luck was just good for me.

Similarly, the 'O' levels turned out the same way the PSLE did, only this time, the results were more credible. Still, it was decent enough and I was happy.

So... why I am yapping on and on about me and my good luck?

Well... I don't know. But I have to say that I still get what I want.


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[04 May 2005|10:01pm]
I... Have been thinking.

And a decision has been made.

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LMAO [04 May 2005|07:21pm]
[ mood | amused ]

The moderators announced that R.O.S.E online would be reset. In other words, everything would be wiped out. Nada. Zitch.


Needless to say, there was much protest, angry words and of course, a naked protest march.


What did I do?

I spent all 600k worth of money on para para scrolls and went around distributing it. Then basically had fun dancin on the streets~! It was quite an amazing sight to see the many players' avatars dancing para para, most of them in the buff. XD It was very amusing. Oh Well. No more free gaming for me. *frowns*


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[03 May 2005|02:32pm]
OMG, my craving for a PS2 has just increased tenfold.

Yes, yours truly has just watched the KH2 PV. Sora looks sooooo damn good. The animation is definitely a notch above the first game. Let's just pray that they don't screw up the voices (refering to English dub) so the game will be perfect.

*starts plotting how to get father to buy PS2 for me*

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[03 May 2005|12:21am]
As promised.
I finished it a while back but couldn't be bothered to put up a link.


I quit my job today.

Feeling damn good now. I am happy that I managed to be the only one able to sit down and slack while the other people were bombarded with goal settings and whatnots.

Basically, there is this sense of segregation among the people in DS. It's not very appealing for me to have someone three years my junior and probably five years younger than me in terms of maturity, being my team leader. These guys (refering to the young ones) don't know when to shut the hell up. It was funny in the beginning but the humour wore off once it didn't seem to end.

Even though I think my supervisiors need a course in time/people/resource management, I cannot help but agree that they are fantastic sales people. I have seen how certain sales people work *cough*APB*cough*, and I can't really say I like their aggressive attitude towards sales. Rather, too aggressive approach. It is not that single sale that is important. It's ensuring that the customer is made willing, not forced, and will approve the product or service. The people at MSH are good. One of the supervisiors in particular is simply amazing at making a pitch. I might have problems with his personality and bad jokes but I could hardly find any fault in his delivery or attitude when closing deals. There is almost no way anyone he targets can escape his clutches.


Busy busy week ahead, with much to do and much to acheive.


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Be gone: Evil evil depression thingy [02 May 2005|01:10am]
[ mood | geeky ]

I finally realised why I was pretty edgy these days. A combination of:
1> Childish (in a bad way) adults. Some adults are idiots. Really.
2> People who CANNOT organise. Yes, follow that STOOPID STOOPID team system. Why not? It's a BRILLANT *not* Idea to make people who stay in the East make their way to BISHAN in the far west at 10 in the morning.
3> Broken promises. When are they going to actually start a meeting on time?
4> NO acceptance letter.*koff* more about this later
5> Lack of ME time. I have 15GB worth of anime waiting for me.
6> NOT leveling up fast enough (pertaining to ROSE) I need a t-shirt that says, "Save the MUSES~!"
7> Being ignored. No. You don't like me calling? Fine. I won't.
8> PMS I hate using it as an excuse but it really does do things to my emotions. Heck I am a healthy 19 yr old girl anyway.
*Looks up*
That's a hell lot of html.


I am quiting. I really cannot take anymore incompetent people. I don't like to be threatened. Only my parents can do that. Others have no right to order me around to do things that are not reasonable.

Honestly, I love the job. I like talking to people, especially those that appreciate a smile and a simple hello. Those who are in the Admin side of work cannot understand what it feels to be rejected and looked down upon like pest. We are human too, we have emotions. Don't ignore us or worst, treat us like some sort of deadly disease.

If you see a promotor standing on the streets, trying his/her best to smile as if the world is alright, smile back and listen for a while. It might seem like a waste of time but it is something that would make that particular promoter happy. It would be nice to feel appreciated.


There are some people that you know you like, and some that you will never warm up to.


Currently following:
Erementar Gerad
Gakuen Alice
Law of Ueki
Speed Grapher
Shaman King
Tsubasa Chronicles
Yakitate Japan
Trinity Blood.

I serious need to fix my burner.


After venting frustration and whatnot out via banging on those Japanese drums in the arcade, I feel much better even though my arms feel like lead. Spent the afternoon with Mich basically looking at underwear and cracking jokes.


Me: I wonder what happens to all As students.

Mich: *pokes sports bra* ? *continues poking it*

Me: Do they really want to have straight As?

Mich: Yeah... Good what.

Me: *Looks down at chest.*

Mich: *twitch*

Me: *grins*

Mich: *laughs*

Example two:

Me: Are those eye patches?

Mich: Huh?

Me: *stares at ultra small bikini top*

Mich: ...


OMG. When I stepped into the revamped Comic Connection, the first thought that ran through my mind was: "Where the hell are all the manga?"

Then I promptly went to hunt for the manga-for-people-with-aquired-taste (gay pRon, duh), and was disappointed to find none. I hate the fact that the place has become to commercialised. But CC has almost everything anime/manga you can find. There is even an Itachi pouch thing. And a very nice FF8 pocket watch thing that is calling out to me.

Probably will head off to Kino for the 20% offer thing. kukuku.


Behind Master
is being taken up by Chuang Yi? *shakes fist in air* It's suppose to be exclusive to me~! I found it first~! *whines* I am onto volume three already~! *whines*


And... something kindof screwed up my plans. Or rather my father's 'great plan to escape Singapore'.


I met Kurt. Again. Twice today. It's starting to get a bit freaky. I always bump into him. It's like Turn Right, Turn Left gone horribly wrong. I like the guy, but not enough.


Cosplaying Yuiko from Loveless for Cosfest. XD All you need is pink hair, neko ears and lots of bust for an eleven year old.

It's the easiest thing I can think of at such short notice.
I probably set up store for the one at the end of the year.


Crap. I am behind in my translation work. Poor Eclaire must be banging her head again her keyboard.



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[30 Apr 2005|06:10pm]
[ mood | amused ]

Since I am not in the mood to talk.

There is some truth in thisCollapse )

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[30 Apr 2005|10:30am]
IF there were one of those days that you hated everything...

You would understand how my day is going.


And I am leaving.

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Fried. [28 Apr 2005|11:19am]
Double Degree in Chinese and Japanese?


SINCE my dad WANTS to get a bloody degree (I wanted to go to Flim School *pouts*), let's do something that sounds bombastic like a double degree in Chinese and Japanese. Might result in my suicide but HEY, atleast I will sound intelligent/stupid for picking such courses.

THEN I can blame my father for FORCING me to take this study route and BASICALLY SCREW my dreams and ambitions.


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Grope feista continues [22 Apr 2005|04:04pm]
[ mood | amused ]

There was much groping going on in the office yesterday. I secretly believe that the girls that were with me are closet fangirls since we were all rolling on the floor LMAOing. The reason behind this was a threesome attack that resulted in much nipple tweaking and grabbing in places the sun don't normally shine (unless you are into the whole sunbathing naked thing).

I must remember to bring at least some reading material or drawing stuff to work or I will definitely die of boredom as the supervisiors struggle to organise the roadshows. Thankfully, my HDD player is back and working better than before. Hence, you have me listening to JJ and Jay Chou. I am desperately trying to fight off the singing vibes that plague this group of people but I can't help but lip sync to the words of some of my favourite songs.


This morning's roadshow was a total flop for me. No deals yet.

It's funny how I manage to run into the people that I knew but lost their contact due to handphone thief two months ago. I got Standley's number and he was so cute as he tried hitting on the guys in my team when I told him about the honey incident. Probably will message him later on, asking him if he has any 'Kang Tao' (connections) with the local theatre scene. He said he was working on Madam Butterfly and that sounds really cool~!

Then today, I bumped into John, who was distributing flyers. He passed me some contacts too, to look for other temp jobs. XD. I serious am getting hooked on working. It's not much for the money, heaven knows how little I am earning now, but more for the experience and BLB scenarios~! interaction with various sorts of people. He was also into gaming and played a little of R.O.S.E. I was greatly amused by how he masqueraded as a female character and getting hit on by guys online. XD


Hee, receiving comments on this journal by people non-lj friends is fun~!! ^0^ Welcome to my world~! Hope you don't get psychologically scarred by my journal entries or start doubting my sanity due to the sometimes stoopid and incoherent posts.



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Too interesting... [21 Apr 2005|09:56am]
I wanted to post up a pic of the CG I am doing. It's still in the works but I am so damn proud with what I did with the clothes that I wanted to show it off. But since I am too lazy to post up the current saved file (it is really big) I am just gonna put up a fuzzed out shot of this character's face. Image hosted by Photobucket.com

I was already quite satisfying with the hair shading... but now, I am soooo proud on how I rendered the school uniform the character is wearing!!

The fun part is actually discovering my own style. I didn't want to have those standard outlines that most manga artist employ. Two reasons for it: One being that I don't really like having the lineart as without it, the character seems more realistic. Two, I am too lazy and I suck at doing nice and even lines.



The guys in my office are so gay. There is so much BBB vibes going around the office!! Hell, there was this instance where you had two of them sitting together (the taller one on the shorter one's lap) licking honey off each other's fingers. And I am starting to suspect that everyone in the office smokes. If you share a cigarette, it's considered an indirect kiss right???? As usual, I had to suppress the urge to giggle like a silly fangirl. Plus, they are very fond of using CERTAIN types of swear words. Which makes it even worst. For example:

Boy A (uke): I think I lost my handphone!

Boy B (seme): Not at my place right?

*Boy A starts to rummage through his bag in the middle of a carpark*

Boy A: **** I can't find it la~!

Boy B: Sure a not? I help you find.

*Boy B starts to grope Boy A*

Boy A: Hey! What are you trying to do?

Boy B: See if you have it in your pocket lor.

Boy A: Don't anyhow touch touch can? In public carpark somemore.

Boy B: What?! You scared I **** you here isit?

*random curses in hokkein that also goes along the line of "screw you".*

Another Example:

X:You gay isit?

Supervisior Y: What? Who is gay?

Z: Me lor.

Supervisior Y: O_O

Z: *grins* *Starts inching closer to Supervisior Y*

*Grope fest begins*

Supervisior Y: WAaaaH~! Molest ah~!


I finally got the chance to see some damn (insert swearword here) Singaporeans.

I was doing door to door sales with one of my seniors (who is younger than me ~_~) and he just knocked on this household. The reply that came was, "Get Lost! OR I call the police!!"

I am like, " What the cow?" My senior was less polite, replacing the "cow" with much more enthusiastic swears and curses.


Damnit. If I thought Grace was bad. The 'boyband' in the office is worst. THEY CAN SING ANYWHERE!! And serenade the aunties on the bus, streets etc. Sadly, they are grossly out of tune most of the time. But I have to commend them on their confidence. They can approach anyone and fears of rejection don't seem to exist to them. If SNAGs exist, these guys are probably the Ah Beng versions. They act like typical Ah Bengs, but can be really nice. All you have to do is be serious with them, and they will toss their candid behaviour aside. So... you can call them silly, but sensitive.

Sweet guys. But I will never admit this to them.

Because they keep pestering me with quotes from The Pacifier:

The enemy has a boat. Four Jetskis and a Chopper.

Damn irritating.


6 comments|post comment

Mind blocked [19 Apr 2005|01:02am]
[ mood | blah ]

This issue of copyrights is getting to me.

I know my work is not exactly brillant but then again, there are those kind of stupid people who would pick my stuff as a resource. Funny how this is coming from me... given my not so 'appropriate' form of getting things I want off the net. But just to be fair, I would buy the things I get off the internet if I had the means to do so. (I spend obscene amounts on LEGAL cds too okay?And it's not my fault they don't sell pRon and BBB stuff in the shops.)


I am just getting worked up over something.


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Oooo... Sushi~!! [15 Apr 2005|11:44pm]
[ mood | amused ]

I guess the perk for working at Cold Storage Bugis would be the fact that I get off work at the same time the prices of sushi drops. I never had so much sushi at such low prices!! *smiles*


Today was a pretty good day.

I saw my dream bishounen (uke). He was practically a pretty boy in every sense of the term. So I basically stared and covered my mouth to hide the drooling. Too bad he was with his mother. ~_~;

There are too many good-looking guys passing by my work place.



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So tired [14 Apr 2005|09:10pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

Crap. Today was hellish.

I couldn't sleep the whole night hence resulting in me nearly sleeping through the rest of the day. The SADM faculty test was... just ... irritating. I don't even know where I stand.

Then I get the crap about promoting Tiger Beer these two weekends... at BUGIS. Damnit. But it kindof turned out to be a blessing in disguise because my Starhub job is also in Bugis, making moving around easier.

I guess the only plus about the day was that there were some guys of my preferences (in other words dudes I thought were hot). Eyecandy makes the world go round.

Basically what this all means is that I am going to be very busy from now onwards... Crappu.


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Crap [14 Apr 2005|05:31am]
[ mood | awake ]

It's five in the morning.

I didn't really sleep at all last night. And damn if I didn't know how important today is gonna be.



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Get on with it. [13 Apr 2005|10:52pm]
My poor poor HDD player has gone to the shops. ~_~ I just can't play me music. *pouts* Thank heavens for me finding the receipt, hence, no service fees. Just two weeks without music on the go. I guess you can call this retribution for getting music from... alternate sources from the conventional purchase of music. On the bright side. The dudes at the Sony Gallery were pretty good for my eyes. Hmmm...


So I went for another 'job interview'. Hell, it was just the guy talking on and on and on about the job. It was as if he was trying to psycho us into taking up the job. But he was pretty nice except for the fact that he liked to single us out and I have discovered that around this dude, I have to be careful over what I say because he might just use it against you. Still, the job sounded pretty decent and cool. Totally commission based. Meaning that you don't sign any deals, you earn nothing. But the more sign ups you get... the more you earn.

Thus, people in Singapore. PEOPLE THAT I KNOW!! Please msg me if you want to re- subscript to SCV or MaxOnline. Why let others earn commission when you can help me out via signing up through me? Tell your friends, family etc. Help me meet my quota and you get ice-cream treats from me~!
(See? I haven't even started the job and I am building my foundations... kukuku) Every sign-up counts. ^-^v Details later... after I am done with training.

Music link:
Orange Range's Hana

Tell me if you want any MP3s... If it is anything anime... I should have it. kukuku


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So...You want pictures... Savvy. [13 Apr 2005|12:02am]
I now have two characters in R.O.S.E online:

Dcal is my first character and she is a support and attack muse... meaning that she can heal and up attack skills while having enough power on her own to survive. I like partying (which, in ROSE language means literally forming a party to fight) with people I know but my list of friends are not always as free as me and sometimes don't come online as often as I would like. So... I have been fighting solo lately. I even have my little spot where I know when and how many porkies will appear and whatnot. ^-^ And I like to horde my zuly (ROSE currency), hence resulting in my having over 250k now since I splured on wings and jewels (for gemming so that my staff will sparkle~!). She is currently wearing is Eqyptian styled robes and has a pretty pair of butterfly wings!! I love her to bits but lately, leveling up has been a pain in the ass so... I have been spending more time with...

dXcal is my second character and he is just for pure fun. He just got his job as a Dealer, which means that as soon as I level him up and equip him with skills, he can start crafting objects~! Hee... I have him topless wearing only jeans~! I can't wait until he is level 15 so I can give him wings. The setback about replaying characters is that unlike my muse, dXcal doesn't have support skills which means he can't rapid ran. That means he literally crawls across the maps while my other character can run around pretty fast. Still, I can't wait till Dcal hits level 50 so I can get my cart license and drive around the world. Apparently, the plot starts when you get to the higher levels.

Here are some screen shots~!

Rush On Seven Episodes~!Collapse )
This is a preview of the CG i am working on... Damn... I finally got the hair basics to look decent. Now i have to proceed to shade it and the face will be completed, leaving the clothes... ~_~ I am dreading that.
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

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